dreamtrance | (no subject)

just a little something trapped in my head.

its un-beta'd and directly from brain to words.

note: there should be a warning on this, but its kind of vague, just know that if you're sensitive you might want to not read

note: 'i' is lowercase on purpose

i alone

Whitehot heat flows through you as you feel your skin layed open under the sting of the leather. You cry out a howl almost inhuman, unable to contain the feelings inside you. There’s a pause, not stopping, just waiting until you’re ready to continue. Until you’re ready to push on. You go and go until you reach the breaking point. Hovering there at the edge of something so beyond your comprehension you can only grasp at it and have it flutter through your fingers, untouchable. You hover there, at the edge, waiting.

You’ve been here more times than you’d like to admit yet every time when you reach that point you can’t go further. Something stops you. Something holds you back. You don’t know what it is anymore than you can understand why it is you long for it. But you do. You burn for it and grasp for it but can’t reach it. Soft words urge you on, pushing you to reach for it but you back down. You’re afraid.

This time is different. Soft words buzz in your ear. You don’t really grasp what they’re saying but know they’re there and they’re pushing you on, urging you to keep going. You shake your head, body racked with sobs but the words continue. They wrap around you like a blanket, calming you, bringing you closer to comprehension, holding you tightly letting you see.

You feel the pressure as the hothard leather is gently brushed over the splayed skin of your back, the burning intensifying as the nerve endings burst sending shivers of pain through you. You whimper shaking your head and rock back against it. The words are still there. Urging you to keep going. Comforting you. Asking you. Begging you to let go. Give in to it.

Your whole body shudders as you give in. Give in to the wantneed overtaking all of your senses the burning deep in your soul to press on, further, to the edge and over. Pushing on.

The words are still there, comforting you, holding you. They don’t stop as the last blows strike and your whole body screams as your senses explode, blinding you. The only thing you can feel is the release as you’re sent over the edge. Every feeling, every thought replaced by pure white heat.

--

You come back to this reality and i’m there, holding you, keeping you safe. You look up at me scared, still trying to grasp everything, trying to understand. i look back and just hold you, reassuring you. i understand. i alone know what’s going through your mind because i’ve been there.

When you can speak you thank me. You thank me for giving you what you need and i merely shush you. You don’t need to thank me. i give you what you need because i too know what it feels like to want, to need. i give you what no one else can or will. i do it because i alone, love you.