2003-02-05

dreamtrance: (i dare you)
2003-02-05 12:10 pm

(no subject)

it's lunch time so I feel the need to ramble, be prepared

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1) I am getting really tired of not knowing who to talk to or how to do things. There really needs to be a way you can just learn these things during your first week. Like a reference manual of who to talk to for what and where to go to find things.

granted that's pretty much impossible but damn would it be a really freakin' good idea.

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2) chocolate for lunch is a bad idea. first off I'm not a huge chocolate fan, second it makes my stomach all icky. Though I haven't bothered to get up and go get real food so it's my own fault. I'll do that later.

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3) why is it when I get writing a new, big, story all my other ideas for not-so-involved, easy-to-sitdown-and-write-out ideas run away? not fair man. I havent written anything except the new AU in forever, its bugging me.

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4) I love the smell of grapefruit and it's evil that B&BW created grapefruit peppermint cuz I'm obsessing over the lotion and body mist. must. have. grapefruit.

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5) I'm now enrolled in a class called "Managing Your Career at Lockheed Martin". I'm actually looking forward to this, strange as that may be. On the same note I'm actually looking into taking the GRE and getting my masters. It is both scaring me and exciting me. I'm not sure I'm ready to spend 40 hours a week working and another 20-30 with classes and class work. It's not the same as going to school and working in the kitchen 15-25 hours a week.

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6) I am completely and utterly insane. Or at least something along those lines.

just thought I'd point that out.

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7) babble about working for a defense contractor, war, the space shuttle, and related or un-related other things )

Yeah I didn't mean to babble that much but *shrugs* what can I say. I'm off to go read my friends list, check out my webpages, and flush out ideas for the choeyposse and the tattoo site.

ttfn


Fu.
dreamtrance: (deep)
2003-02-05 12:47 pm

(no subject)

It burns with the fire of a thousand suns.
Searing you from top to bottom
Your skin tender in the defense of itself
You feel it inside
Feel your blood boil
Feel your lungs ache with effort
The fire raging inside.

The ache rips through you.
Pulling at tendons.
Pushing on muscles.
Squeezing your heart
Every beat becoming shallower
Quicker with more effort

The chill follows.
Starting from inside your bones
Radiating out
Your fingers go numb
Then your hands and arms
Your feet, legs
Until you can’t feel anymore
Can feel only the chill

The chill falters and is replaced by the pain
Dull constant pain
Impossible to pinpoint
Making up your conscious
Taking over your unconscious
It’s not all encompassing like the fire or the chill
It doesn’t incapacitate like the ache
It’s just there

It lasts longer
Even forever
Following you from the beginning
And after the end
Following you through eternity

The pain of love.